How long have you been married?

Married since February 18, 1983. I wanted to marry on Valentine’s Day so I could remember the date but Marj said no! We had both been married to 2 other people.

​

How did you meet?

I worked for the city of Corpus Christi, TX full-time but played the guitar, sang and entertained audiences with my music as a solo artist. I had written some of my songs. I played one of my songs at a large singles Sunday School Class and Marj came up and talked. After a while we were interrupted and she asked if I wanted to come to her house for lunch. That was in October 1982.

​

How long have you been a caregiver?

Marj was diagnosed in the summer of 2001. We both continued to work until I was diagnosed with and treated with radiation for Prostate Cancer in 2006. From that time on I have been her only caregiver until September 2015 when we got a caregiver to help me.

​

What has been most helpful to you during this time and how?

My job is to be Marj’s caregiver. I have not worked since I retired. Included in that job is my obligation to keep her as happy as I can, one minute at a time. Caring for her is not a burden of any sort, it is a pleasant, fun and creative project! Even with a limited income, we travel with our travel trailer, “TT” as often as time and money allow. We both enjoy traveling. I am a staunch supporter of attending Alzheimer’s support groups as often as you can. We attend together and that makes it much easier and more fun.

​

What has been the most challenging part of being a caregiver?

The most challenging part has been to change me and my personality to adapt to the job of caregiver. I must adapt to her. That includes daily changes. My biggest struggle is with my patience. That is countered and tempered with God’s care for both of us.

​

Imagine that you've just met a person who's loved one just received their diagnosis yesterday. They are at Day 1 of this journey. What advice would you give them?

Be realistic everyday and accept your situation as it is every day. Accept the fact that this disease always gets worse and never better. Seek a closer personal relationship with God as you understand God. Seek God’s help not religion. There is a huge difference. Turn directly to God as you understand God.

​

 Is there anything else you would like to share?

Humor is a great, little used asset with this disease. With your charge, embrace life together and laugh. Get out, get as active as you can and be as grateful as you can for your blessings this day.  Use prayer and meditation or as I define it: Prayer is when you talk to God and Meditation is when you listen to God. Try it, it works.